Melting down and shoring up

Checking in to say hi. It’s the middle of the session, or almost, and Meltdown Moments have begun in several quarters.

After the excitement of the first few days (arrival, greeting old friends, meeting new ones, discovering our classes and students, checking out the goods at T. J. Max…) a period sets in where the food in Proctor becomes really boring (when in fact it’s not bad at all) and the daily routine seems exhausting. It happens to most of us, students and profs alike.

I had my own little meltdown last night, for the first time since the accident. I was feeling frustrated at a lot of things, and my lack of mobility seems almost a travesty here. I should be strolling from the Château to the library to get my coffee in the morning, chatting with a student or a colleague, instead of rolling, rolling everywhere and almost always alone. I should be up at 6:30 to get ready for tennis instead of getting up at 6:30 just so I actually have time to shower, dress and have breakfast before my 9:00 class. I should be buzzing around my classroom or my choir rehearsals instead of sitting like a mushroom trying vainly to see everyone over the tops of the computer screens or other singers’ heads.

I keep falling asleep early – I can’t seem to stay awake as late as I usually do, and this takes several hours off the time I usually have to prepare my class or do some other useful and necessary thing. My room is a mess, my laundry needs to be done.

The weather has sucked since the beginning of the session, and I’m always cold.

So last night I fell apart for a little while, and I feel better this morning.

Students are having their meltdown moments too, and it’s good when they are able to tell us about them; it does help to have a shoulder to cry on for a few minutes. And sometimes we can even offer practical help, a little useful guidance.

Things are looking up, however, and this week did have it’s good moments. There has been a little sun from time to time, and last Tuesday (Bastille Day) I had a fun adventure.

Jason and I hit the road at about 4 pm, and went up to Burlington. We did some shopping at the Price Chopper, where first I and then he had a blast riding the Basketmobile. After shopping, we had dinner at a Chinese restaurant in South Burlington.

We then headed to St. Michael’s College where a concert was being given by a “French Group” (according to the ad), directed by Vincent Renaud and Francis Bardot, both of whom I know from Paris. Vincent Renaud and I co-directed “Lorraine Motel” for the Festival d’Ile de France at the Pavillon Baltard a couple of years ago.

The concert was lovely – I was impressed at the vocal quality of Francis’ children’s choir. After the concert I was able to chat a little with both of them; Vincent was ill, as were a couple of the children, and as they were only in their first days of a U.S. / Quebec tour, I hope sincerely that the flu is not currently raging through their ranks…

After the concert Jason and I headed back into town and had a quick drink outside on the terrace of one of the bar / restaurants I’d always wanted to go to but had never had a chance to frequent. It was chilly, but not so much so that we couldn’t relax.

And then… we went back to South Burlington to the Palace “Theater” (cinema) to see the midnight showing of the new Harry Potter film.

I recently read somewhere that one can tell how evolved a person is by the things they consider to be “fun”. I think it was lots of fun to be among the first in the world to see the new H.P., at midnight… I’m not quite sure what that means about me, but I don’t really care. Seven or eight of us, including a colleague and his young daughter, waited impatiently in line for 45 minutes, trying not to eat all the popcorn before the film actually began.

The crowd was impatient, like us, but very civilized. Quite unlike the crowd I’d once waited among one Paris evening to see the Rocky Horror Picture Show; after THAT adventure, I couldn’t walk straight for a week from having been shoved into a metal barrier by rabid Rocky Horror fans trying to be first to get a seat. No, here in Vermont, there was no violence, just a lot of really excited people (most of them young, I admit, but there was still quite a bit of diversity in the audience.)

Somewhere around 3:30 am we returned to campus, and we did get up in the morning to teach – although I had warned my students (who are teachers in their own right, during the school year) that THEY would be in charge of Wednesday’s class… They hadn’t quite believed that I meant it, but when I looked around the room and asked, “so what are we doing today?” one of them cheerfully stepped in and started working on the material I had left for them the day before in preparation. See? Gotta take me seriously on some things, folks…

Today there is sun, and it’s Friday, which means that tomorrow is Saturday… So things are looking up. And I do love what I do here, there is no question about that. So I just have to stop whining, get organized, take a deep breath, and remember joy. It’s still there, as am I.

Kisses…

B